And I should've done my report at the end of last week, rather than now.
And instead of sitting here in the creepy computer lab blogging, I should be sitting in the computer lab doing that damn column.
But the fact of the matter is, I just don't think that what I'm feeling right now can wait. And I somewhat treat this blog as a good friend. A human, possessing humanly traits such as listening (and appreciating) what it is that I have to say.
I feel that although I've only experienced nearly nineteen years of life, I typically have quite the abundance of passion. Passion for passion, passion for people, for music and art and language. But as of recently, I feel like I lack said passion in my life. And that's the catch, is that passion mingles your very thoughts and your being, your innards once you even play with the thought of possibly losing track of that passion.
My mouth tastes dry, my face appears limp, my step feels heavy.
But now, the more that I think about this whole thing, I wonder if maybe I never really 'lost' this passion that controlled my very movement, but maybe it was just hibernating. Maybe it's simmering in my soul-stew.
But when will it be back is what bothers me, because it won't just hit like a traffic accident, speeding my heart rate and shaking my hands. No, it will sit and wait, until the very wrong (which could in turn be very right) moment, and every so slowly paint itself in front of me.
I don't know what it takes to get it back, but I really miss it. That's what I know for sure.
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